Why?

I need a break.

School as usual again. ):
I openly guailan * today. Hahaha. Whatever. Lala. And J is a distraction! Rah! Hahaha. I seriously don't know why I'm blogging shit stuffs. Anyways, Guzheng, was Rah. I suck, I swear, I suck alot. I should just go jump down the building and die. Rah. ): Today's morning was like FARK. Early in the morning, and I get SHIT. He don't want to go to school, what has it got to do with me?! I never ever cause you two any trouble okay. Rah, I hate it. Why does everything he do links to me?! Are you people are afraid to scold him? Why do you people always scold me? Treating me like some dog who you can vent your anger on. Thanks. So nice of you. Since you say that I'm a burden to you, then I should just go. You don't need me around. I'm you two's burden. I'm sorry. It's all my fault. I hate myself. ):

Went home with Catherine. Talked alot of retarded things. Hah.
Home's not a good place. For me, that is. ):
I dread going home everyday.

Okay, I hate my life. Kill me, please?

I cry whenever I think about all those things. I cry, I think I've controlled enough. All these years, more and more problems. I'm just a person. I can't keep alot. I've already kept 15 plus years of things in me. Bottled up feelings. Yes. Call me an idiot, but I don't care.
It's so hard to let go some things, sometimes, you don't make the right decisions. And sometimes you don't make any decisions at all. Everything goes wrong, who's to blame? The other party? I will blame myself the most. Yes. I'm personalising. I don't like to blame others. No reasons. I find myself weird. I hate myself more than anyone in the world hates anything/ anyone.

Why do I keep running from the truth, when all I ever think about is you.

It's good that not everyone knows this blog. I'm lazy to make it private, 'cause you gotta invite people and such, and some of the people don't have an account. Blah.
Okay, now, I hate getting sick. I can't take any medicine, 'cause I'll have rashes, and the bloody doctors don't know what I'm allergic to. How clever of them. So, I'm not stuck with my stupid nose block, and whatever else. My nose have been giving my problems ever since I was born man. Rah. Hate it. When I'm not sick, I want to get sick, and when I'm sick, I don't want to get sick. Gosh, whatever.

Goodnight &Sweetdreams!